Hey moms! Let's talk about the wild world of women's underwear sizes – because apparently, figuring out the square root of a complex math problem is easier than finding the perfect pair of undies!
First off, why are they sizing these things like they're plotting a secret mission to Mars? I start as a small, feeling all snug and cozy, and suddenly I'm questioning if I accidentally dipped into the kids' section. It's like playing Goldilocks, but instead of beds, it's about butt coverage.
Then there's the medium, the elusive size that promises comfort but delivers a panty parachute that could double as a hot air balloon. Seriously, are these undies or a DIY camping tent? I'm just trying to avoid a wedgie, not set up camp in the wilderness.
And let's not forget the lacey ones – because nothing says comfort like a fabric that transforms into a Swiss cheese masterpiece after two wears. It's like they're playing a game of "how many holes can we add before it disintegrates?" Spoiler alert: not many.
Now, there's a special place in underwear hell for those skinny undies designed to suck in the mom belly. Sure, they do the job when you're trying to squeeze into that pre-baby jeans, but wearing them daily? It's like strapping yourself into a sausage casing. Not exactly the breathability I was hoping for.
So, here I am on a quest for the perfect underwear – a journey filled with size discrepancies, lacey craters, and skinny sausage casings. I've accepted that comfort might be a mythical creature in the underwear world, but hey, at least the search keeps me laughing!
Until the day we find undies that fit like a dream, let's embrace the chaos, one wedgie at a time. Cheers to the brave souls navigating the perilous path of women's underwear sizes!
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